Matthew R. Powell on 2010

so it's 2011 and i look back on 2010 and i say : "man, what a year"

and you're all like: "why?"

so i lay down the facts: "well, i got all those great grades and i got into GSP and all these really nice colleges are scoping me out."

you look disappointed. "come ooooooon. that's all you got for me? what a square."

anxious to prove myself not a square, i say: "alriiiiight. well, i went on a road trip, conquered my fear of opening my eyes underwater, rode on a dolphin's back, learned how to juggle, ghostrode a car, ran a mile in under six minutes, did a backflip from a standing position, beat andrew in ping pong, wrote and produced a locally successful rap album, tied a bow tie, went mexican sledding, had a massive snowball fight, mastered the fine sport of curling, successfully revamped the formerly defunct Henry Clay Intramural Ping Pong Club, high-fived the majority of the uk basketball team, waded into the Pacific ocean, balanced ten pencils on my face, bought a ticket to one movie and stayed in the theater all day, went to bonnaroo, conversed with someone in spanish, yelled out my name on national television, tried alligator jerky, rode a bike with my hands not on the handlebars, perfected my impressions of jerry seinfeld, lil wayne, charlie from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, louis armstrong (as well as adding new ones to my rehpitwar), got my brother to stop smoking, lit a match on the bottom of my shoe as well as the pavement and the side of a building, got more good at grammar, increased my abilities on the basketball court, and bench-pressed Geet Parikh."

"NOW YOU'RE TALKING!" you yell enthusiastically, and we high-five.